In the Shadows
by Macavity666
Summary: Demeter and Macavity meet again. What will happen to their love? Or is Macavity just playing his games with her, using her like before?


**IN THE SHADOWS**

**This is my first try to write an english fancic. I try my best^^**

Demeter PoV  
It was late at night when I walked through the streets of London. Everything here looked kind of familiar, but I couldn't remember why. The alleys were empty and quiet. Scary, in a strange way. What the hell was I doing here?  
'You shouldn't be here', a voice whispered in the back of my head. 'This isn't the right place for a cat like you.'  
I shook my head. I didn't know what I was doing here nor what I was looking for. But I knew I had to be here. It simply felt right.  
The houses were decayed; the windows smashed in and nailed up. I shivered. Maybe I should really return to the junkyard… suddenly I saw somebody walking towards me. His eyes burned like fire in the night, and in a flash I knew who he was.

"Nice to see you, Demeter." He smiled.

"Leave me alone, Macavity", I hissed.

"Why so angry? Or are you just… scared?" Macavity came closer. I could smell him, the scent of danger and courage brought back all the memories. I took a few steps away from him. He followed me.

"Hey! Don't you want to greet an old friend? Where are your manners?"

I snorted. "You're the right one to talk about manners."

Macavity laughed. "Wow. I really missed your sarcasm. Well… what is a beautiful cat like you doing in this dangerous neighborhood?"

"Leave… me… alone." I turned around and ran. Was I scared? Perhaps. I still couldn't forget the things he had done to me. Why had I come to this area? How stupid could a cat be?

I heard him behind me. Of course, he wouldn't let me go so easily. Damn. I looked Macavity in the eyes. "What do you want from me?"

"I just wonder why you want to go back to the Jellicles", he answered.

"They are my family. Why should I stay here?"

"Because… I love you?"

"Was this a question?"

"Demeter. I know I have done terrible things, but please, I have changed." He stood in front of me now. "Please. I still love you. I have loved you all the time."

"I… I-I don't believe you", I muttered.

"The Jellicles don't cherish your talents. Munkustrap has never loved you like I do. You are something special, darling."

"I'm not your darling!" But a little part of me wanted to be it again. Some part of me still loved him… No! "How should I be able to trust you? You… you…" My voice broke off. "You tried to rape me", I whispered.

He nodded guiltily. "I know. And I'm so sorry, my dear. But times have changed." Macavity sighed. "Every time I look up to the moon, I wonder if you are doing the same. The nights seem so cold and empty without you, Demeter. You are the only star I can see tonight, the only light in the darkness of my life." He closed his eyes. "I love you."

I wanted to scream "No", but the only sound I could make was a quiet whispering. I was afraid of this cat, but also fascinated. Nobody had ever told me such wonderful things, not even Munkustrap. Maybe Macavity was right. Maybe he HAD changed, maybe I belonged to him.

"Give me a reason why I should believe you."

"Because it's the truth." He looked me deep into the eyes. "I wouldn't lie to you. I will never lie to you again, I promise."

I wanted to trust him. I wanted to be with him. I wanted to love him, like a long time ago. But somehow… I couldn't. It simply felt wrong. This was Macavity, the Napoleon of Crime. The hidden paw. The murderer of so many innocent lives. But that seemed to become more and more unimportant. Old feelings I thought I had forgotten suddenly crawled back into my heart. I looked at him. The cat that had changed my life forever.

"Darling", he whispered. "I made mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes. Don't you remember the good times we had? I was there when nobody else was. Please… can you forgive me?"

I took a deep breath.  
"I forgive you…" I moved towards him and placed my head on his shoulder. Though I couldn't see his face, I knew he was smiling. And for this one moment, everything was all right.

"Where do you want to go tonight?" Macavity asked as we were walking down the street side by side.

"I don't know… where do you live?"

"We're almost there." He pointed at an old warehouse that appeared in front of us. "It's a great proof of trust; you know… not many cats return from here."

A little white cat appeared. "Good evening, Macavity!", he called with a shrill voice.

Macavity snarled at him. "Why don't you just go and tell the whole town that I'm here?" The sentry winced.

"Sorry, Macavity", he whimpered. "Won't happen again."

"I hope so. Otherwise this isn't the right place for you."

The cat nodded fearfully and lowered his head. "Have a good night, Macavity", the white one whispered and disappeared in one of the nearby bushes.

Macavity looked at me. "I'm sorry. He's new here."

"Didn't you treat him a bit too… roughly?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I have to. Or else he will never learn it. And that would be bad… for him. But forget this idiot. Do you want to stay overnight?"

"I don't know…"

"You don't have to be afraid. No one will harm you."

"That's not what I mean. Munkustrap will be worried…"

He laughed. "Munkustrap? This fool never cared about you. Forget him. I'm sure he's already found a new girlfriend. I once saw him with this red cat… what was her name? Bombalurina, I think…"

"No. Bomba is my best friend; she would never do this to me…"

"Darling, there are many things you don't know about the Jellicles."

We entered the warehouse through a hole in the wall. I tried to ignore the intensive smell of blood, but that was impossible. Macavity looked at me understandingly.

"Sorry, my dear. I'll lead you to my office; it's cleaner there…" He guided me to a stairway. "Please follow me."

There were cats everywhere. Many of them looked really dangerous, and I tried to stay right behind Macavity. I didn't want to know what they were doing.

Macavity's 'office' turned out to be a great hall on the top floor. A great desk stood in the middle of the room and the walls were covered with trophies – dog collars and things I didn't even wanted to take a closer look at.

I couldn't see any cats, but the silence up here couldn't keep out the noise from downstairs. Somebody screamed, but maybe this was only in my imagination. It would have been the right soundtrack for this horrible place.

I had often thought about the headquarters of the Napoleon of Crime. Not much had changed since I had been here; everything looked exactly like this a long time ago.

'It won't happen again', I said to myself, struggling to believe it. 'You are stronger now. Braver.'

Macavity turned around.

"Welcome. I know many of these things seem familiar to you. And maybe some of them remind you of the time… our time. Maybe not all of those memories are good. If you want me to change the furnishings, no problem. If you want anything, just tell me or one of the agents. They know who you are, and they know what I'll do to them if they harm you." He looked me in the eyes. "I'd do anything for you."

I nodded slowly.

"It's just… I don't know. I can't believe you love me while down there… you…" I lowered my head. "You kill cats."

He sighed. "Would you like it better if they killed me? Because that's what they would do if I'd let them. They hate me, and they hate you because I love you. I don't kill without a reason, darling. That's what your Jellicle", he pronounced this name with contempt, "friends want to tell you. But they are wrong. They have always been wrong."

"Why?" I asked Macavity directly.

The tom closed his eyes for just a moment longer than a standard blink. "I'm sure you know I, too, was a Jellicle once."

I nodded again. "What happened?"

"I know what they tell you on the junkyard. I turned evil. Without a particular reason, from one day to another. But that's a lie, like everything that comes out of the mouth of a creepy little Jellicle is a lie." He looked at me. "Of course I don't mean you. You deserve better condition than a dirty wrecking yard." Macavity pointed to a big sofa, like my people had in their living room. "Do you want to sit down? We've got a lot of things to talk about."

He jumped on the black cushion and I followed him up. My family had never allowed me to get up there, I remembered with a smile. I sat down next to Macavity and faced him eagerly.

"Well... I'll start from the beginning. Did you know Old Deuteronomy is my father?"

"I've heard of it before. But it has never been more than a rumor for me."

"It's true. And… I have two younger brothers. Half-brothers, as a matter of fact. The Rum Tum Tugger… and Munkustrap."

I couldn't say I was shocked. This wasn't really a surprise for me, but a fact that I had ignored for far too long. And I didn't even mean the Munkustrap-and-Macavity-are-Half-Brothers – Story. Somehow it was this whole Jellicle-Thing that disturbed my entire world view. How could Old Deuteronomy ban his own son from the junkyard?

It seemed as if Macavity had read my mind.

"I wasn't the perfect follower he was searching for. I was too… clever. I think he was afraid in the end, though he was so much older and mightier than me in my… younger years. He could have destroyed me so much earlier. And he hates himself for the mistakes that he has made." A grave expression suddenly appeared on the ginger tom's face. "He thinks I ruined his life. In his eyes, I'm the root of all evil. This stupid old Jellicle has no idea of the real world outside."

Was he really talking about Old Deuteronomy? This wasn't the Jellicle leader I knew, I thought. "But… Macavity… " I didn't know what to say and he noticed that.

"Shh. Don't say anything, my dear. It's good that you know the truth now." He gently took my paw in his. "You should go to sleep now. I'll come to you after arranging a few… business… affairs outside." He smiled. "Sleep well, my love."

I watched him as he walked towards the door.

"Mac…" I whispered.

"Yes?" He turned around.

"Thank you."

"Never mind. I thank you, darling. For everything." With this answer he left the room and shut the door quietly behind him. I lay down on the couch. 'I won't be able to rest after this day' was the last thing I thought before I closed my eyes and soon was sound asleep.


End file.
